Deadtime Stories: Tales of Death (1986)

Once upon a time when you were six years old your parents used to tell you "bedtime stories." Somehow those stories became twisted in your dreams and you sometimes had the worst nightmares about haunted heroes fire-eating witches and bloodsucking werewolves who ate children for breakfast. Remember? Well hold on to your popcorn because your favorite nightmares come to life in a horror/fantasy salute to the age-old bedtime story ritual. Travel on a mysterious journey to a medieval world populated by blood-crazed witches evil experiments and captive maidens. Then from the catacombs and dark caverns of medieval Europe you plunge into modern suburbia and the frolicsome adventures of a nubile lady jogger tracked by a savage werewolf. Finally sensuality becomes macabre black comedy on the trail of three escaped mental patients who share a country house with a daffy murderess. Pray you can sleep again!System Requirements:Running Time: 81 Mins.Format: DVD MOVIE Genre: HORROR Rating: R UPC: 014381342123 Manufacturer No: ID3421ZVDVD Product Description

Just a fun flick!

When a babysitting uncle is asked thrice to tell bedtime stories to get his nephew to go to sleep, he concocts three weird yarns that must be seen to be believed. The first is an ancient tale about a young man owned by two sister witches working to awaken a long dead third. The second tale is a modern day Red Riding Hood story about a sexy young jogger who is pursued by a werewolf with good intentions but no self control. Last, we have a goofy dark-comedy inspired by Goldilocks and the Three Bears, only in this story the three bears are a family of escaped, homicidal mental patients and Goldilocks is a cute but murderous girl with psychic powers.

If that synopsis sounds interesting to you, then that's a good start. You may want to look into this movie. Here's what you have to know. This is a low-budget horror film from 1986, and the DVD case doesn't represent the movie at all really. Bottom line, this is a fun horror-anthology movie. Not one that is going to really scare you or creep you out very much even (depending on your creepometer), but it's great for a night of wacky horror movie watching. It's lots of fun, that's all. It's no masterpiece. It's presented in fullscreen, and I have no idea what is up with that. The case says it is presented in its original aspect ratio, 1.33:1, but Internet Movie Database gives the O.A.R. as 1.85:1, and, I'm thinking IMDB is probably the more trustworthy source here since the DVD doesn't even give us the full credits, ha. Seriously, the film cuts off shortly after the credits start. I thought it might be my unreliable bedroom DVD player, but I've read the same complaint from other folks, so... Besides that, the presentation quality is pretty weak. I mean, it looks the same as the VHS I originally saw of this film years ago. Still, I got this REALLY cheap, so I'm not really complaining, even if there are no extras. Like I said, I find it to be a very fun film. Oh, yeah, and Mallory's boyfriend on "Family Ties", Scott Valentine, is the young man in the first story, for those who wanted to know. I know a lot of people have sought this film out for that reason alone. Myself, I just have a thing for Red Riding Hood stories, though Goldi Lox's shower scene turned out to be even nicer.

July 1, 2008

Great, Fun, Classic Horror Fun

I first watched this movie back when it was new, and had a blast. This is what happens when a film purposely doesn't take itself too seriously, and it shows in the end result of these fun, (and in the case of Goldilocks), outright goofy takes on classic bedtime stories with a horiffic twist. The other reviewiers obviously did not experience true 80's horror i.e. Sleepaway Camp, My Bloody Valentine, April Fools Day, and Motel Hell to name a few. Horror today is way too self-absorbed, over-analyzed, and the movies are mostly made to please a demographic that really don't appreciate what makes a good popcorn night. A couple exceptions would be Slither and Feast which give an obvious nod to the 80's style and are indeed a treat. I have spent 20+ years collecting and studying the horror genre, and believe me, Deadtime Stories is ten dollars well-spent. February 14, 2008

el oso grande

The story lines are predictable and the special effects are cheap. I gave it 2 stars because the neigbor's kid like it. August 24, 2007

Utter crap

I try to find some good in any movie I watch, even when I know I just bought a low-budge B movie. Hey, a lot of B movies make up for big budgets and prime distribution by being just darned good films. Deadtime Stories, however, is just a throwaway and not even worth a rent. Don't even bother unless you're getting it for free.

This movie lacks everything that can make movies rise above humble origins. The direction and cinematography are completely lacking in anything unique, or even familiar but well done. Good lighting, interesting camera work and good use of environment seem to be completely ignored (or just unknown).

The first story, involving a slave boy (well, young man) stuck serving a couple of witches trying to resurrect their dead sister, is downright stupid. Every dumb witch cliche' you can imagine is served up with equally bad dialogue and lame acting. No stars.

The 2nd story is supposed to be a "sexy suburban jogger" take on Little Red Riding Hood, but it's also stupid. It doesn't even make you laugh at it's failings, it just comes across as completely vapid. One star for a half-decent makeup job on the werewolf's face, which you get to see for a few seconds at the end.

The final story, which I reached only by hoping things could get better, is the worst. And I was hoping.... Anyway, here we have a family of phychos who have just broken dad out of what must be the most badly conceived mental facility ever shown on film. Even the attempts at making this something of a dark comedy fail because it all comes across as a great idea stolen from greatness by an utterly incompetent writing/filmmaking team. So, we have a brain-dead take on Goldilocks and the Three Bears with Goldilocks being even more whacko than the psycho "bear" family. Oh, and she has telepathic powers! Oh, and the mentally-challenged baby bear (a full-grown man with the mind of a 5 year-old) gives Goldilocks her first, ahem, thrill (in another completely horribly-done scene that lasts maybe 5 seconds and doesn't even appear to be sex until she exclaims how good it was), saving him the fate of her past boyfriends, most of whom are rotting in the house! Oh, and so they all live happily ever after once she does a "Bewitched" on the local newsman! Good grief, how stupid.

Please, resist all temptation with this one. It really is far, far, far away from living up to any promise in the premises of it's stories. The ideas could have been fun to see done with some talent behind them, but there is none here. July 23, 2007

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