Black Christmas (2006)

PATHETIC

What is with this recent need to create back-stories for psychopaths? Am I supposed to be stirred by the poor-pitiful-me exposition? I wasted 90 minutes watching this drivel and don't want to spend much more time even thinking about it, but here's the scoop:

* the killings are ridiculous and implausible (the icicle impalement and death by thrown ice skates in particular are howl-worthy and, let's see...IMPOSSIBLE)
* characters are lame and of course act in typical "bad horror film" fashion (although when one loses an eye, the natural response SURELY MUST BE to want to eat all the eyes of your victims) ??!!!??
* and are we actually supposed to believe that the killers are body bagged and taken to the morgue with no one ever noticing that THEY'RE NOT REALLY DEAD?!

Sometimes bad horror can be good -- alas, this is merely bad horror. Period.

Shame on Andrea Martin and Bob Clark for having anything to do with this pathetic mess. September 7, 2008

Typical mindless killfest with no soul whatsoever

A group of girls are staying in their sorority house for X-mas. Later, they start disappearing one at a time. After realizing something is wrong, they then come to believe they are being stalked by the killer who once lived in the house.

These days I give mostly all remakes a chance. I don't come into them with intentions to compare it to the original and torch it. I was willing to give this a fair chance. Even if this remake didn't carry the name of the original. It's still a very bad horror movie to me and one of the worst as well.

Black X-Mas does a horrendous job using the atmosphere and mood to instill fear on the most basic level. Cheap scares are present of course and come off more annoying than anything else. There is very little reason to care for any of the characters. And what's a horror movie these days without background via flashbacks on the killer? The gore is the biggest attraction but it comes off so cheesy at times. And I'm not sure but it seems ever since Hostel. Writers are just obsessed with the eyeball. I just don't get it.

I can give very detailed reasons to express my dislike for this movie. But that will require very big spoilers. Something I'm not big on at all. I recommend this to those who love bad horror movies, gore, and just find fun in practically everything. Anyone who despises remakes right off the back, shouldn't even waste their time or money. September 1, 2008

Bad flick, but I'll admit I had a blast watching it

Horror purists weren't too happy about a remake to Bob Clark's 1974 cult classic Black Christmas, but don't go into the remake expecting anything like the original about the only thing this version has in common with the original, is the name and setting. We don't learn much about whom Billy or Agnes is. But in the remake that is all explained.

Outside of the opening murder scene, Black Christmas 06 is a totally different movie. If anything this is more of a remake to your run of the mill 80s slasher movie. The original Black Christmas is one of the all time greats and I would recommend any aspiring horror filmmaker to watch it so they can learn how to craft a story, suspense and effective scares. The sense of dread and looming danger never lets up from the opening scene, even in the slower scenes that sense of dread remains. The same cannot be said about the remake; there really was very little suspense or tension. All that is replaced with a high body count and a lot of gore; at least there is some action something this movie needed. Violence and gore doesn't make a movie good, but at least something is happening and again this movie very much needed all of that.

The script by Glen Morgan is rather weak; the characters are your standard slasher movie characters with very little depth. But one thing I did like is Kate Cassidy, Michelle Trachtenberg or Mary Elizabeth Winstead could have easily been the final girl. I won't spoil, which one of them is, but either one could have been. Glen Morgan was one of the writers of the first Final Destination, which I thought was excellent and he also did a good job with Willard, but here it's like a whole different filmmaker.

As director Glen Morgan doesn't fair much better; his scenes lack any suspense or tension, but he does make a movie that is absolutely hysterical even if it wasn't the intentions of Glen Morgan. The flashback scenes are so silly and over the top one can't help, but be amused. The last flashback with Billy had me cracking up. Maybe that was the intention?

The final act is so over the top I refuse to believe that Glen Morgan was making a serious movie. I think some of the problems were after Willard flopped Glen Morgan had trouble getting another job. On the DVD he clearly shows no passion for the project and says this isn't the type of movie he wanted to make. He's doing what the audience wants. Big mistake, as a filmmaker you have to do what you think is best. Of course you keep the audience in mind, but at the end of the day you have to make the movie you want. If you give in and make a movie you have no passion for it very much shows. I'm sure the Weinstein's played a part as well so I won't put all the blame on Glen Morgan. The Weinstein's are known for interfering with the movies they are involved in and I'm sure they played a part in the outcome.

The kills scenes are pretty much the same, when someone is stabbed it's done with such rage, but instead of being scary or disturbing it's rather funny. When Billy stabs someone he does it so fast that odds are you'll be laughing rather than be freaked out. And when did Billy become a cannibal? I wasn't grossed out nor was I disturbed at that. I found it so silly that I couldn't help, but laugh.

The cast is your typical cast you'll find in a lot of the more mainstream movies these days. With that said though the cast does do a good job and even though I prefer unknowns or cult actors in horror movies I was pleased with the cast. The one thing Black Christmas has going for it over other horror movies is the women are beautiful. Easily this is one the best looking casts I have ever seen in a horror flick.

Just take the movie for what it is. What I found was a decent 80s style slasher movie that has the so bad its good quality. By no means is Black Christmas a good movie; several times I rolled my eyes, but I have to admit I was very entertained. As a remake this movie is no doubt a travesty of a remake, but as it's own film, while still bad, but works on the so bad its good level. I'll be the first to admit I had fun watching this and really enjoyed it.

The original is by far the better movie and I highly recommend it, but again the remake is a fun film in how bad it is. Just try and put the original out of your head and take this for what it is; a silly slasher flick. August 19, 2008

The worst movie i've seen in a year, honestly!!!

The quality of the DVD was great, however, this movie wasn't worth the $1 that I spent for it. Poor acting and a dry plot plaqued it. STAY AWAY, FAR AWAY!!!! July 25, 2008

Stop your crying, the original sucked!

I have to say, I really hate when classic films are remade to get the attention of new audiences, but when it comes to a film like Black Christmas, it certainly needed a remake. The original dud was so over-the-top boring that a remake actual sounds like a horrible idea, but by completely refreshing the idea a pretty good movie came along. I'm not saying this is the greatest horror film of all time, but at least this Black Christmas is a fun way to spend 90 minutes. I've really missed the slasher films of the 80's and everyone's out there doing their own takes on "Scream" over and over, it's about time we fans get a big budget campy gore movie. The acting isn't horrible, the gore is awesome, the villain is new, it's creepy, funny, and just all around awesome. I honestly don't see how people expect to go into a film like Black Christmas and get an intelligent spine-tingling film, and I'm pretty sure that's where the bad reviews come from. If you go into a horror movie expecting a good time, this one can't disappoint. July 19, 2008

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