The Ring/The Ring Two (2002)

God is in the TV

Now that it's nice and dark and quiet, with the only noise that of the tap-tap-tap back in the shadowy hallway---probably the faucet, what else could it be?---let's talk.

Let's talk, you and me: let's talk about Fear. The Fear that comes at about 3 in the morning, with nary a light in the house nor a Moon on the rise to light the shadow-realm of your bedroom, when you wake with a start bathed in sweat, and imagine---no, realize---that there's a dank, hunched, miserably contorted figure, its hair matted, its eyes shrouded---hulked at the base of the bed. And it wants *you*, my Darling: oh God yes.

As a matter of Revenge, for starters: but for death, and carnage, and torment, and terror. It wants to peel back your soul and show you Hell. And Hell is wet, and cold, and slimy, and dead.

But first, it will be content to just scare you to death. And chances are you'll stumble on her by accident, which is the way of Horror in our world.

Disc #1: THE RING: So it is that roving Seattle reporter Rachel (the impeccably delicious Naomi Watts) stumbles into the jaws of horror, investigating a mysterious quadruple---well, my God, what?---suicide, homicide, something more sinister---that steals her away her gnomish son's beloved cousin in a single night of terror.

You probably know the score: you see the video, your pupils registering its otherworldly chronicle of night gaunt nastiness beyond the mortal coil. The tape hisses, buzzes, closes with a sputter. You recoil a little, sit back in the dark. The phone rings. "Seven days", comes the little girl's voice, out of the darkness. And in seven days you die.

Now: snobs will make awful clucking noises and tut-tut away when you tell them how much you love "The Ring", one of the greatest, truest, nastiest ghost stories ever transferred onto film. The Americanized remake, I mean---this one!---not the original by Hideo Nakata.

Let them tut. Gore Verbinski's remake distills all the terror of the original---which consisted of about 10 gut-wrenching moments crammed into the beginning and end of the flick---embellishes it with lushly rain-drenched cinematography, graces it with fine acting (Watts is at her tormented, quixotic-crusading best, and little Dave Dorfman makes a creepy, perfect little gnome-child, while the immortal Brian Cox looks like Grief made flesh), and sauces it up with a juicy score by Hans Zimmer, channeling Philip Glass by way of Mishima.

It's all of the horror of the original Japanese Ringu, with none of the white noise. Watch it in a dark room, then turn the TV off---quickly---I dare ya. She never stops. She never sleeps.

Nor will you.

Disc #2: RING 2: Record. Rewind. Die.

You remember that scene in "The Ring" where Rachel (the unspeakably tasty Naomi Watts) looks out across the vast wind and rain-swept chasm separating her apartment block from another row of grey, grimy, utterly identical tower blocks? Remember all the Lonely People, with all the glimmering, flickering, very hungry TV sets?

That RECORD button on the ol' VCR turns out to be a deadly weapon in "Ring 2", in which original director Hideo Nakata takes the helm and proves that everybody---I mean *everybody*---really does get their 15 minutes of fame. And not in a good way.

Rachel (Watts) and her hideous, ghoulish, large-headed gnomish child (David Dorfman, uber-creepy in his role as an uber-creepy kid---he succeeds) move to little, rural, innocent Astoria, Oregon. A few months into the job, Rachel realizes nasty little Samara---an undead chick badly in need of a haircut and totally grooving on Marshall McLuhan's "the Medium is the Message" vibe---is still out on the prowl, nipping and tucking amongst the locals.

Now: do you really care about the plot here? You shouldn't, because---while Nakata's new offering is cold comfort compared to the really nasty grue served up by Gore Verbinski (pretty bizarre, since Verbinski was merely aping Nakata's original)---this is still a dose of the Cold Creeps, served straight up, on the rocks.

First off: Nakata has done a sublime job in investing every square inch, every microsecond, of this flick with a creeping, omnipresent sense of crawling, lurking, skulking dread and malevolence. As flawed as the CGI-deer melee in the woods is, it's more bizarre---and in context, more unnerving---than anything else pushing its way out of mainstream horror these days. She never sleeps, after all, and she's really not into venison.

Anyway: The plot is astonishingly stupid, but the atmosphere is so menacing, so earnestly creepy, that you won't mind a bit. Dorfman proves he can do creepy-kid-gnome like no other child-actor, *ever*. Naomi Watts is drool-inducing, and still rocking on the tormented-mama front. Good work! And Sissy Spacek is about 28 degrees of pure spine-shivery creepy crawliness, as the shadow-haunted nuthouse-confined birth-mother who probably mated with a demon that crawled up out of the waves. Or some gawdawful thing. Brrrrr.

The point is: "The Ring Two" is a nasty little set-piece that is creep-crawly, sick, dark, a little spooky, and decidedly menacing. Is it a fitting follow-up to its scream-like-a-girl-and-run predecessor? Of course not. Is it good, spooky fun?

I'd tell ya, but isn't that the phone ringing in the background? Well? Aren't you going to pick it up?

JSG September 18, 2007

First you see the "Ring"... then you die

Most horror movies actually lack horror -- lots of shrieking blondes, guts, blood and sharp objects. But such is not the case in "The Ring," and to a lesser degree its sequel, "Ring Two" -- these movies have a deeply creepy villain, loads of atmosphere and (mostly) good plotting.

"The Ring" opens with single mum Rachel (Naomi Watts) attending her niece's funeral. Weirdly enough, several of her friends died on the exact same day, at the same time. Rachel investigates the mountain cabin all the kids stayed at a week ago, and finds a videotape with a series of bizarre images -- and a curse that will kill you one week afterwards.

She enlists the help of her ex-boyfriend Noah (Martin Henderson) to help her unravel and break the curse. The secret of the tape is wrapped up in a young girl, Samara, who vanished from her adoptive parents' horse farm years ago. Somehow Samara's evil rage has lived in on her curse, and it will destroy Rachel, Noah and their son unless Rachel can find a way to escape it.

"The Ring Two" opens with Rachel and Aiden (David Dorfman) leaving for a small town, trying to escape the memory of Samara. At first, everthing seems fine. But then a boy is found with a horribly distorted face -- meaning that the tape still exists, and Samara is still able to attack innocent victims.

Even worse, Aiden begins showing signs of psychic power, and seeing visions of Samara in reflective surfaces. Rachel realizes that the ghoul-girl wants to possess Aiden, and must dig even further into Samara's history to find her birth mother. But to save her son, she may have to make the ultimate sacrifice -- herself.

Remaking Asian horror movies is a big thing at the moment, with everything from "The Grudge" to "The Eye" getting the A-list Hollywood treatment, with varying results. But "The Ring" was the first of these, adapted from Hideo Nakata's adaptation of Koji Suzuki's novel. (Cue cries of "but the original was better)

And it's a surprisingly good adaptation. Director Gore Verbinski alters a few things from the original film, but keeps the same dark, murky atmosphere and many of the same scenes. Even some of the same camera shots are preserved, though he also amps up the sense of quiet, creeping horror as the end of Rachel's seven days approaches.

For the sequel, however, they got in Nakata himself. And surprisingly, the original director didn't do as well; perhaps he underestimated American audiences. But there's a sloppier feel to "Ring Two," some scenes (the deer) that make no sense, and an ending that was apparently lifted from another of his own movies. Despite this, the performances of the actors and some truly horrifying moments keep it suitably gruesome.

But the keystone of both movies is Naomi Watts. This was the ultimate starmaking turn for this talented actress, and she is nearly perfect as the perpetually worried Rachel; as the deadline approaches, her fear and grief are almost overwhelming. Henderson is also good, whether as a flip carefree artist or as a caring ex, but Dorfman seems less like a little boy than a pompous oracle.

While the sequel is sloppier than the first, both "Ring" movies are horrifying and quietly chilling, with one of the scariest and most memorable killers in cinematic history. January 9, 2006

"The Ring" (2002) and "The Ring Two" (2005)

"The Ring" is one of the best American Horror films ever made. Very creepy and involving. It plays out like a mystery where you as the viewer have to put the story together with different clues. It is shocking and wonderful. "The Ring Two" is a decent follow up. Not as great as "The Ring" but as far as sequels go it is a logical advancement of the story and gives a worthy conclusion. There are plenty of scares and mystery to go around with these two great films. Pick them up if you only own them on VHS and want them on DVD or if you are just looking for some good scares. Also look for great performence by Naomi Watts.

"The Ring"- 9/10
"The Ring Two"- 7/10 December 28, 2005

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