 |  | Aging pornstars can't save this lousy slasher film |  |
This film is pretty much like every other camping-trip-ruined-by-inbred-cannibals movie you've ever seen - except Evil Breed: The Legend of Samhain does it with aging pornstars. I have to question the filmmaker's reasoning here. Young pornstars I could understand. I don't care how hot Chasey Lain, Jenna Jameson, and Taylor Hayes were back in the day, all of the body reconstruction work is beginning to show, as are the effects of various substances they've probably injected into themselves at one point or another. Furthermore, why do I want to go through the torture of watching a horrible movie just to see a couple of them topless when a quick Google search could take me right to video clips of them getting their freak on when their implants were still new? I will grant the filmmakers a little leeway when it comes to Ginger Lynn Allen, since she has actually done a fair share of mainstream films over the years. But get this - these guys have Ginger speaking with an Irish accent. You just have to laugh at this nonsense.
Okay, getting back to the actual film. I don't know what college these folks are from, but their teacher, Karen (Bobbie Phillips), has eschewed the classroom setting in order to bring them to Ireland and show them real history. Her entire lesson plan, I must note, seems to consist solely of a few moments spent cracking jokes around a circle of rocks. Only one girl, Shae (Brandi-Ann Milbradt) is even interested in the subject; the others just want to have sex. Everyone soon goes their separate ways, get attacked by cannibals, yada yada yada. The whole thing would be excruciatingly unbearable were it not for one man, this film's one and only saving grace. And that man's name is Gary (Simon Peacock), who turns up again and again, right out of the blue, to warn the Americans not to stray off the path in those dangerous woods. Say what you will, but I think more horror films could use weirdo Scotsmen popping up now and again to utter dire warnings in a distinctively brogue tongue.
Let's be clear: this is a lousy horror movie with an atrocious ending. Yeah, it's good for a few laughs but that's it. The only good thing about it is the gore, but I obviously didn't find the film nearly as gory as some. Yeah, there's blood and entrails and all that good stuff, but it all looks fake. No one loves a good beheading more than I do, but the one in this film is just ridiculous. Of course, the gore would have been much more satisfying if we had been able to see the film as it was originally made. Sadly, Evil Breed: The Legend of Samhain is what is left after a significant amount of gore and nudity got snipped out of the original version. Why you would heavily edit the only two things going for you (in this case, nudity and gore) is beyond me; it's cinematic self-castration.
September 5, 2008The DVD, which arrived today, is in wide-screen letterbox format, as advertised, but it does not have closed captions (or optional subtitles), and the aspect ratio is not 2.35:1 (it looks closer to 1.66:1). I ordered the DVD chiefly on the basis of its advertised features and I am very disappointed. Caveat emptor.
July 8, 2007 | | A COMPLETE DISAPPOINTMENT! | |
THIS IS ONE OF THE MOST BORING MOVIES I'VE SEEN!THERE WAS NO SUSPENSE,EXCITEMENT,GORE-NOTHING TIL 1/2 HOUR BEFORE THE END.I ONLY BOUGHT THIS DVD BECAUSE JENNA JAMESON WAS IN IT.THAT WAS A BIG DISAPPOINTMENT!SHE ONLY HAD A 2 MINUTE PART DURING THE MIDDLE,AND A 2 MINUTE PART TOWARD THE END.THE PICTURES OF JENNA ON THE COVER AND BACK-TOTALLY MISLEADING!NOTHING LIKE THAT AT ALL IN THE MOVIE.THIS WAS A WASTE OF MY MONEY AND TIME!THIS WAS A TOTAL DISAPPOINTMENT!DO NOT BUY THIS!YOU'LL BE SORRY YOU DID!
May 30, 2007| | | Meh, could have been better, and wtf is with the ending? | |
Not bad if your a horror fan looking for a simple horror movie. Don't look much beyond that though. Really I would only give it one star, but I was able to grab a copy with the two deleted scenes, which alone where enough to bring it up a slight notch. Not much, but it does at least show you the potential the movie could of had with better actors and less editing.
Don't pay any attention to the cast for this movie, as all the stars that are billed, namely porn stars, have about 5 minutes of total screen time, all combined. For the most part it's all based around the other much less known actors, which is for good reason, cause they are not very good. The Barbara and Shea are good on the eyes at least.
The others have already stated enough encompassing reviews that another is not needed, but the ending to this movie leaves far to many questions. Apparently this was do to heavy editing. But they should have just scrapped it at this point. I watched and re-watched the ending about 10 times, and I still stand there wondering what the f*** is going on. It makes absolutely no sense, what so ever. None. Zippo. Perhaps if you see it and understand you can let me, and apparently the other reviewers know.
March 19, 2007 | | Jenna was better than the "actors" | |
Another mutated, inbred, mountain "family" who like to chop up and eat stupid college hiker kids who just insist on getting lost in the woods in the dark. Jenna had a funny scene when she gets caught and is being cut up by one of the mutant mountain men and he reaches into her chest and pulls out a silicone boob enlargement sack, which he sniffs and tosses into a pile of bones. Hilarious! Other than that this one is pretty forgetable, rent Devils Rejects for a real mutant inbred treat.
February 1, 2007More reviews at Amazon.com ...
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