Survivors Exposed (2001)

Follow six beautiful contestants as they travel to a remote, lush tropical island and try to survive any way they can and go home with more money than they know what to do with! Get ready for a vacation that you'll never forget! Vote for your favorite survivor as they suffer through a host of tropical adventures and give new meaning to the concept of forming alliances! Aimee Sweet, Alexus Winston, Aria Giovanni, Julie K. Smith, Lenny Juliano, Shauna O'Brien. Dir: Doug Hoffman.

What?

I fail to see much wrong with this disc. While I may not see as much comedy in it as some people, it's because I've never watched or followed Survivor. But, on a whim, I tried out Survivors Exposed here, and got much more than I expected. Like what you ask? How about Julie K. Smith and Aria Giovanni (looking her best might I add) running around naked? Yeah, stop reading right here, and track this sucker down. Two of the most beautiful, natural women on the planet are here, and get more than just a few minutes of screentime. Oh, and the movie itself is pretty good too.

The movie's plot is simple- throw a few beautiful women on an island gameshow ala Survivor, and let them do their thing. Fortunately for us, none of them get voted off on a regular basis. The beginning of the movie is mostly interviews with each contestant, each one bringing their own unique charm. Especially Julie K. Smith as Ruby. I fell in love with this woman in The Bare Wench Project, and her attitude's just as prominent here as it was in that movie. Though she has a bad haircut, it adds to her tough-girl character even more. She's the bad-ass of the group, serving in the Iraq war at some point before coming to the island. Babette is a pseudo-French woman who's basically able to cram everything people think about the French into her lines. Ranging from a love for underarm hair to not taking showers, she says everything we've heard for decades. While Survivors Exposed isn't exactly full of character development or anything, she's definately the most interesting character. Monica, played by the lustful Aria Giovanni. She gets naked the most of any other contestant, and that's not a complaint. She also has some of the best personality and one-liners. All of the other contestants are good too, but these three get the most camera time, as well as the host, Cliff. He, also, was in The Bare Wench Project as Lunk. This guy's enjoyable, and has great delivery. It'd be nice to see him on primetime tv in any form. But anyway, the movie isn't much aside from some jokes and naked women. When they're attacked by animals, they're just stuffed ones, but the girls pretend they're the real deal. And some things are just out of wack. There's a god damn gorilla attack later on in the movie, which just left me confused. But don't go into this one expecting some hot action with all the girls. It's pretty tame, dispite them getting naked every few minutes, and sex scenes are just fancy camera play to make it look like more's going on.

The picture quality is pretty good for a low budget picture like this. It's in fullscreen, and was probably shot on DV cameras from the looks of it. There's some grain and blurry shots, but nothing that detracts from the overall movie. As for the audio, it was nice and loud, something that surprised me. They definately did a good job here.

So why 4 stars? Well, there are two whole special features. Some bloopers with the cast and a photo gallery. The photo gallery is actually pretty nice. Pictures of all the women in pretty erotic poses. Nothing too dirty, but actually tasteful. I especially like the ones of Tess. The blooper reel however, isn't that funny. It's mostly screwed up lines. Nothing more. And it runs for under 10 minutes. I wasn't expecting a commentary track or anything on this feature, but some interviews with the actresses would've been nice, or even cast bios. Though that's what the internet's for I suppose.

If you can manage to find Survivors Exposed, and like beautiful women being playful, pick this one up.[...]If you're looking for something with hot woman on woman action...go download some porn or something. Sheesh, didn't you get that by now? March 29, 2005

Complete Waste of Time and Money

This is a terrible movie from the makers of the slightly-better "Bare Wench Project". It stars 6 beautiful women and 1 annoying ugly guy who gets more screen time than all of the girls combinded. This is a T&A movie with very little T&A. The girls talents are completely wasted. A typical sceen shows a 1/2 second clip of a girl either topless of wearing a bikini while dancing on the beach, followed by a 3-4 second clip of the annoying guy as he reacts to the girl dancing, then back to the girl for a fraction of a second, then back to the guy for a terribly long time. Whoever edited this movie didn't understand what the point of this type of movie is. There are lots of lengthy interviews with the clothed girls that dragged on and on. The picture quality is poor, since it was shot with hand-held digital cameras, and the lighting was harsh, since it was mostly shot in direct sunlight. I will admit, however, that a couple of scenes had me laughing. Don't waste your money on this one. February 21, 2002

Survivors Exposed (2000) d: Hoffman, Doug

Packaged to cash-in on the hit CBS reality television show Survivor (1999), and if it wasn't for the small print stating the films lack of affiliation, one would think that this DVD contains the girls from the show, or perhaps it delves into some lurid details of the real lives of each of the contestants. None of that here..., but don't fret my friends..., we got naked women poking fun at survivor. Six mostly topless women survive on the island of Butta Cheeka; yet rarely compete [One contest that does take place is topless plane signalling], or are voted off. One girl named Monica [Aria Giovanni / California Dreams: Beach Blanket Malibu (2000)] is spanked by the other girls instead. The large breasted cult movie star Julie K. Smith [Day of the Warrior (1996) Return to Savage Beach (1998); Bare Wench Project (2000) plays a top-heavy tough Navy Seal named Ruby. Shauna O'Brien [The Seductress (2000)] plays the sneaky French babe who eats [fake candy] slugs. Other characters include the bible thumper [Alexus Winston]; the free spirited party girl who loves "Naked Day" [Aimee Sweet], and Tess Broussard the southern girl who gets hungry for the other beauties, when the food runs low. There is not one ugly duckling in the bunch, except for the sometimes funny host [Lenny Juliano?]. The obviously horney host gets in the way of all the boob action. In the end... It is he that is finally voted off the island, and the lesbian loving women decide to stay. Looking for a great story, amazing FX, or good acting don't waste your time here. If naked lesbo women with large breasts are your thing, Survivors Exposed is for you. February 5, 2002

Oh, what it could have been

With all this beautiful talent to work with, this flimsy spoof
is flirtatious waste of time. The movie tries to have it both
ways, funny and erotic, but is rarely neither.

Unimaginitive and unstimulating September 18, 2001

Great Fun!

My last review didn't show up -- hope this one does. Love the film, lots of fun, funnier than expected and the girls are all beautiful. Special mention to Shauna O'Brien and Aimee Sweet. A fun parody, but don't expect Shakespeare. August 27, 2001

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